“Halloween: H20″ plays more like a slick, Hollywoodized remake of the original “Halloween” than an actual sequel. For the most part this is a good thing though I do prefer Zombie’s films to this one. Laurie has become a neurotic mess after her two encounters with Michael. She is a little older but not necessarily a little wiser. She has turned into a functioning alcoholic whose only saving grace is her son John. This all works thanks to a great performance by Curtis who honestly has never been better. She knows this character better than anyone and plays her believably close to home. She isn’t a hero..she’s merely a survivor. When it does come down to the final showdown with Michael, she is willing to do whatever it takes to get this nightmare out of her life. Too bad the sequel fucked that all up…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCOvCMYldNA

One of the most heartfelt documentaries I have ever seen, Best Worst Movie examines the perspective of a “bad” movie from all angles. From the fans to the filmmakers to the cast, everyone talks about their experience and it has changed (or hasn’t changed) their lives. It’s a really sweet doc that I wasn’t expecting to find much weight behind. Boy was I wrong… It’s one of the best movie experience I’ve ever had in my life and makes for a wonderful double feature with the Jim Wynorski doc Popatopolis. A note to filmmakers and film lovers alike, just because something is “bad” doesn’t mean it can’t or doesn’t deserve to be loved.

Humongous is a fun, homage filled 80′s slasher that rips off a dozen other, better slasher films but still manages to be a lot of fun. Remember the scene at the end of “Friday the 13th Part 2″ where Amy Steel pretends to be Jason’s mother? This film sure does as the exact scene is repeated here to lesser effect. That being said, the kills are fun and characters are a tad bit better developed than most of the other 80′s slashers out there. David Wallace is particular is quite strong as our lead twin Eric. Most of the time in 80′s slasher, guys are given nothing to do but not so here. He almost becomes the film girl by being smart, likable, and even given a chance to emote. Lead Janet Julian possesses similar qualities and has a lot of fun with her “last girl standing” appearance. This is a must watch for fans of the early 80′s slasher genre. I can’t say that everyone is going to enjoy the film as much as I did as the film is quite slow and repetitive at times. Nonetheless, it is one of the better examples from the under-appreciated genre.

The ending of this movie is GENIUS. Genius I tell you. The rest of the film? Not so good. This is one of those movies in which a slow burn is confused with waiting around for an hour and a half for something to happen. Not a whole lot works here. The performances are either dull (Black and Reed) or screechingly over-the-top (Davis and Meredith) that you really don’t get a good grasp on any of the characters. That being said, the ending makes this film worthwhile. The sheer gutsiness of the filmmakers to decided to go with this dour and downbeat ending has to be commended. If you are bored you could do far worse but I don’t think this is a movie that HAS to be watched. Then again, most movies aren’t. That said, I still love the bat shit crazy Karen Black.

Shark Night is everything that a horror movie shouldn’t be. It’s PG-13, it’s loaded from beginning to end with grating pop/R&B songs and the characters are so cookie cutter boring that you won’t care who lives or who dies. I would say that you want them all to be shark bait but once you’ve seen one awful shark attack in this film, you’ll feel like you’ve seen them all. Add to this a ridiculous third act twist that makes little sense (seriously, watch the movie and tell me how it is even POSSIBLE for the redneck hillbillies to do what they did) and some of the most implausible events I’ve ever seen in a movie and you’ve got one of the worst movies of the year.

Though, truth be told, it is comforting to know that if someone loses an arm in a giant lake, you can easily find it in dirty water by swimming out from your lake without a mask or goggles. After this, while locating said lost arm, you can also spot a bloodthirsty shark. When you see said shark, you can out swim it even though it can overtake a speeding boat with someone skiing behind. Did that just make your brain hurt? Ugh. Join the club. Piranha 3D & 3DD were both dumb, harmless fun. Shark Night doesn’t even deserve to be played on Syfy.

Just when I thought the movie couldn’t get any worse, I was treated to this after the end credits:

The Sleeper is a non-stop 80’s blast from beginning to end. The deaths are graphic and over-the-top in the best ways possible and the direction and screenplay by Justin Russell is pitch perfect. As I watched this film, a smile grew on my face. I saw the references to Halloween, Friday the 13th, Slumber Party Massacre, and Black Christmas and appreciate them more than I can possibly let on. This was made by someone who loves and cherishes the slasher genre and that heart and soul is in every frame of the film. Sure, the movie isn’t perfect. There are far too many characters and some of the acting is a bit flat, nonetheless, those same criticisms could be said about even the best of the 80’s slasher films. Do yourself a favor and check out “The Sleeper”. If you enjoy horror homage at its finest, you will have a blast. I cannot wait to see what Director Justin Russell has planned for us slasher fans next.

While many horror purists believe that the first one is the only “good” entry in the Silent Night Deadly Night series, I have always had a bit of a fondness for the joys and the awfulness of the fifth installment: Silent Night Deadly Night 5: The Toymaker.

A sequel by name only, The Toymaker is one of the strangest sequels I’ve ever seen. A young boy sees his father killed by a toy that was anonymously delivered to his house. After that, he is too traumatized to speak, and his mother must deal with both him and the loss of her husband. Meanwhile, a toy maker named Joe Peto builds some suspicious-looking toys, and a mysterious man creeps around both the toy store and the boy’s house…but who is responsible for the killer toys? The twist at the end needs to be seen to be believed (shades of Sleepaway Camp). I can’t in all honesty say this is a “good” film but I can say that you’ve never seen anything like it. Besides who DOESN’T want to see a horror movie version of Pinocchio?

“Cabin Fever” is a no-holds-bars white knuckle horror-comedy that is both scarier and funnier than 95% of the other crap out there. The setup is simple: Five teens decide to go camping out in the woods at an old cabin when, one-by-one, they begin to become the victims of a killer flesh eating virus. As one might expect, many characters are killed in an awesome over-the-top gory fashion and there is a solid amount of nudity for a 2003 horror flick. It can be argued that this movie is not for everyone but fans of 80′s gore films will be in gore heaven.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoJWIXj1VvM

Sometimes I sit through a film and aren’t sure how I feel about it and why I feel that strange way. Pin is such a movie. From a technical level, the film is pretty much flawless. The actors deliver great performances, the script is pretty air tight, the cinematography is beautifully restrictive. The ending is tragically brilliant. I must admit that I did indeed shed a tear when I realized the fate/outcome of one of the lead characters. But, at the same time, is this a movie that I can recommend? Hmmm…that’s actually a very good question. I have no desire to every sit through this depressing heart wrenching movie again and I’m still not 100% sold on who this movie thinks it’s audience is. It moved me but I honestly have no clue how another viewer may take it.

For a killer scarecrow movie, “Husk” doesn’t get a lot of things right. Though the film is well acted and gorgeously shot, the story is a bore. It doesn’t know whether it wants to be a bloody slasher (killer scarecrows everywhere) or a supernatural tale (the brother who was killed and made into a scarecrow who now “haunts” the land). The characters are useless and the deaths aren’t nearly as interesting as they should be (though one impalement is pretty damn sweet). Overall, it isn’t a bad film just one with too much ambition. Maybe there are worse things (see ATM or, better yet, don’t) after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTZndNe8tEc