Category: *Slasher Tweet Review

Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” (1974)

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Our resident Twitter reviewer Tim Schilling is back with another bloody good slasher review. This time Tim is taking on the immortal “buzzworthy” slasher classic: “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” Does it still hold a edge 38 years after its original release or is it a classic that has not withstood the test of time? Get out your chainsaws and start hacking as we find out.

Thoughts before the film:
Gonna watch The Texas Chainsaw Massacre… yes? The original #TexasChainsawMassacre!

Thoughts while watching:
0:00 Apparently #TheTexasChainsawMassacre is wildly popular cause I’m getting retweeted and favorited like a mofo right now!
0:05 In 2001 Maniacs when Eli Roth’s character throws an armadillo at the car, #TexasChainsawMassacre reference anyone?
0:12 10 minutes in and I think I now know everything I need to know about killing a cow.
0:17 That dude was freaking weird and completely random. What the heck just happened!
0:18 Let’s get sliced open from a random freak and read horoscopes guys.
0:21 The guy who kept on going back to wash their car, way too funny.
0:29 Franklin sounds like Donald Duck.
0:39 I can imagine this movie being terrifying when it first came out.
0:46 Sweet Jesus Leatherface, your screams are freaking me out.
0:50 Sassy Sally.
1:01 Smackin Sassy Sally with a broom.
1:11 Grandpa’ is alive!? Or I don’t even know, what the heck just happened.
1:15 There’s the Psycho reference I’ve been waiting to see all movie.
1:17 Tobe Hooper is a very over dramatic filmmaker, but it works perfectly for this movie.
1:18 Sassy Sally is always jumping through windows like she does it on a daily basis.

Overall:
I honestly did not know that #TheTexasChainsawMassacre was as scary as it was. From the weird&creepy music to the seriously frightening screams of Leatherface,#TexasChainsawMassacre is one of the scariest films Ive seen.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “Return to Horror High” (1987)

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In 1987 a little horror comedy featuring a then unknown actor named George Clooney was released upon unsuspecting movie audiences. The film was titled “Return to Horror High” and it was a commercial and critic flop. Barely grossing a million dollars before it was yanked from the theaters, the film didn’t do much to set itself apart besides one wicked cover box. Today our resident Twitter reviewer Tim Schilling takes on the horror comedy to see if this film works at horror, comedy, or neither.

Thoughts before the film:
I love this DVD art way too much. First time I tried to watch #ReturnToHorrorHigh, I couldn’t finish it cause I thought it was so bad. My taste in movies since then have changed WAY too much so maybe I’ll like it this time!

Thoughts while watching:
0:01 Great music right off the bat! The 80’s rock.
0:12 I find it hilarious George Clooney was in this movie.
0:17 That is one hot lady cop.
0:23 Is George’s role already over with…?
0:25 If that guy were to pick up a girl like that now he’d be in jail for like 75 years.
0:28 Shlort!
0:33 Whoever did the killings is back because they like it it. How did this not win the Oscar?
0:35 The sandbox scene… How is that even possible?
0:41 Every time they show the cop and the detective, I get confused. The cop is creepin me out.
0:44 This movie is 99% boobs.
0:52 I don’t know if I should be following the movie or the movie within the movie…
1:04 This is really bothering me that it’s going back and forth from movie, movie within the movie, and dream.
1:13 The sandbox thing makes no sense even after they showed what was underneath it!
1:25 …….wat.

Overall:
I honestly don’t know what to think of #ReturnToHorrorHigh right now. The dozens of plot twists, and going back and forth from real world, movie within the movie, dreams and flashbacks took anything good away.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “My Bloody Valentine” (1981)

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To end this beautiful sunny weekend we have a brand new review from our resident twitter reviewer Tim Schilling. Today Tim is getting out his pike ax to take a stab at the original 1981 cult classic “My Bloody Valentine.” Butchered by censors and critics and ignored by audiences, the Canadian slasher has grown quite the cult following throughout the years. But, is it a cut above the rest or is it a slasher that deserves to be forgotten? Let’s cut open this bloody heart and find out.

Thoughts before the film:
I’ve never seen the original #MyBloodyValentine. I have seen the remake though and I actually liked it quite a bit

Thoughts while watching:
0:01 Who gets frisky in a mine shaft!?
0:04 Don’t drop the soap.
0:06 This hillbilly music reminds me of Two Thousand Maniacs.
0:08 The guy who was dancing with the cutout and said “this is my date”…. me.
0:17 Oh Harry Wardon, you sly guy you.
0:25 This town sure does like valentine’s day…
0:27 I wonder if that’s what you really look like if you were to get stuck in a dryer.
0:27 Or, better question, how did the filmmakers know that’s how someone would look like!?
0:37 What a grumpy bartender.
0:50 Those are the nastiest looking hotdogs ever.
0:58 This mine shaft must have magic powers cause everyone who goes in it, ends up fucking. Or, at least trying to.
1:10 Oh, I didn’t know Barbra from NOTLD was in this. (someone please get this)
1:20 At least the police showed up while the killer is still around and not the second after he dies/runs away.
1:20 Not that they can do anything to help anyways. I mean, they’re the police and it’s a horror film. They’re useless!
1:27 Those last lines were really creepy… Beeee my bloody valentineeee.

Overall:
Not too sure why I liked #MyBloodyValentine. The plot was meh but the filmmakers made a meh plot into something entertaining & actually good.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “Sleepaway Camp” (1983)

Slasher Studios*Slasher Tweet Review

We have a brand new review from our our resident twitter reviewer Tim Schilling. Today he is taking a stab at the original gender bending slasher “Sleepaway Camp.” I’ve loved “Sleepaway Camp” ever since I saw it for the first time at the tender age of 7. Does Tim enjoy it as much as we do? Let’s read his slasher review as Tim heads to camp!

Thoughts before the film:
Not gonna lie, I didn’t like #SleepawayCamp the first time I saw it a million years ago. But, I saw the third one kinda recently (Editor’s note: The third is my favorite of the series) and loved it for some reason! So hopefully I’ll like it this time around. #SleepawayCamp

Thoughts while watching:
0:06 Wasn’t that nice of me? Hmmmmm??? Overacting at its finest
0:07 Their mom looks like a French Snow White.
0:09 I highly doubt all of these kids are THAT excited to be at camp that they have to sprint out the buses…
0:14 Holy freaking short shorts.
0:20 I don’t get how that first person died.
0:20 I mean, I do, but he couldn’t have jumped to the side of the pot..?
0:29 Is there supposed to be a story in this movie or something? Cause So far there’s nothing.
0:40 What’s with the dramatic music when they kiss? Hah.
0:56 Whoever plays Angela, I’m not sure if she’s the worst actress or best actress ever.
0:58 This girl’s boobs ain’t even that big, why is everyone all over her?
1:03 I don’t want it to be that obvious who the killer is…
1:12 How does one die from a curling iron?
1:14 I don’t get why the old guy is blaming the little kid for killing everyone, did I miss something? I was half asleep..
1:16 A candy wrapper on the ground of a camp full of kids. Evidence.
1:19 I love their mom’s overacting for some reason.
1:20 What the fuck Angela you freak! Holy crap.
1:20 That last scene was seriously creepy.

Overall:
Idk why, but I loved #SleepawayCamp. Even with the terrible acting and the TONS of pointless scenes(the first half hour) I still liked it. I liked it more than Friday the 13th actually.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “The Hamiltons” (2006)

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Our resident twitter reviewer Tim Schilling is back with a brand new horror review for us. Today, Tim is taking a stab at the grossly underrated After Dark Horror Fest selection “The Hamiltons.” I’ve loved this little gem of a horror movie since it was first released. Does Tim feel the same way? Let’s dig in and find out!

Thoughts before the film:
I didn’t care for #TheHamiltons the first time I watched it,but everyone else seems to think it’s one of the best from After Dark Horrorfest. Sooo maybe I’ll give it another chance!

Thoughts while watching:
0:10 Stupid blonde… It’s raining out, there wouldn’t be any stars.
0:16 “what do you call it?” “Death.”
0:16 What are the chances that all of these events would happen, and the baby doll would actually end up in Hollywood?
0:20 This is what I didn’t like about this movie before, it’s so random. Who was that old guy at dinner?
0:32 It’s awkward to watch the oldest brother talk to anyone.
0:36 Oh shit, she did triple dare in dare or double dare. We got a bad bitch.
0:37 Incest incest incest!
0:44 I wanna know what Lenny is!
0:57 She sucks on her bloody finger and thinks nothing of it?
0:58 Even if they didn’t have Lenny locked downstairs and those people chained, this family would be fucked up.
0:59 Unless they’re vampires…
1:03 These twins man. They’re freaking me out.
1:14 Lenny, I wanna know what you are and what you look like.
1:17 ~*spoilerZ*~ They are vampires! That makes more sense now.
1:22 Lenny is just a kid! I wanted to see a monster thing. But his little room was way too creepy.

Overall:
I really like the story behind #TheHamiltons, but I don’t think the movie played it out well. It was confusing and very random at parts. Even though I don’t think the plot was made well for the movie, I thought the film itself was made very good. #TheHamiltons

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “Seed of Chucky” (2004)

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Our twitter reviewer Tim Schilling is back once again taking a look at the “Child’s Play” series with a review for the final Chucky flick “Seed of Chucky.” Though the film received recent reviews, it was one of the least successful films in the series when it came to box office and audience reaction. Is it as “bizarre” and “strange” as many horror fans have claimed or does it deserve a bit more respect? Let’s see as Tim cracks open the toy box one final time.

Thoughts before the film:
Finishing up the series cause I’ve been slackin lately. And again unlike everyone else, I actually do like this entry in the series. Haven’t seen it in a while though. #SeedofChucky

Thoughts while watching:
0:04 This house reminds me of an episode of Goosebumps with the living dolls. Anyone else think so?
0:07 You’re pissing your pants you’re pissing your pants!
0:16 What are the chances that all of these events would happen, and the baby doll would actually end up in Hollywood?
0:16 For real someone find it out. I bet it’s like one in 8327263859264.
0:24 I guess I’ve only seen the edited version of this movie before. That was a lot o blood.
0:36 Who doesn’t do that with a Fangoria magazine?
0:40 I wonder how much Jennifer was paid to say all this stuff about herself.
1:03 Glen/Glenda is more fucked up than Chucky.
1:11 Why you crying for your babies? You found out you were pregnant a day ago.

Overall:
#SeedOfChucky basically had the same exact feel as Bride but with a story that wasn’t as good. I miss the camp feel from the first three.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “Bride of Chucky” (1998)

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After a bit of a break from the “Child’s Play” series our twitter reviewer Tim Schilling is back with a review for the slasher comedy sequel “Bride of Chucky.” Tim loved the first three installments giving them 4 Teddy Heads each will this one live up to the rest? Let’s play with Chucky!

Thoughts before the film:
Finishing up the Child’s Play series, starting with #BrideOfChucky. Only movie in the series I haven’t seen yet.

Thoughts while watching:
0:04 I wonder how the car got in the building…
0:07 What. Katherine Heigl is in this. What.
0:10 Voodoo for dummies, why do I think that’s an actual book?
0:11 Sick lip… chain dude.
0:21 At least Chucky is honest when you ask him something.
0:30 Too much Chucky in this one. Less Chucky = better.
0:41 What would Martha Stewart do?
0:45 It’s just weed shut up.
1:08 I see what you did there Chucky! “It’ll take 3 or 4 sequels.”
1:11 Martha Stewart is a reccurring theme in this movie.
1:19 When Chucky and Tiffany kiss, it just weirds me out.
1:22 The world at this point should believe that Chucky actually was the killer and everything.
1:24 She just gave birth on that guy’s face, can’t say I’ve seen that before.

Overall:
Besides losing Andy & the campy feel, #BrideOfChucky is another great entry in the series. It kept continuity & didnt jump the shark anytime.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “The Hills Have Eyes” (1977)

Slasher Studios*Slasher Tweet Review

Tonight we have another tweet by tweet review from the one and only Tim Schilling as he ventures out into the unknown to check out Wes Craven’s 1977 hillbilly inbred classic “The Hills Have Eyes.” This is Tim’s first viewing of the film after loving the remake. How does it stand up 35 years later and does it deserve the praise it has received? let’s find out!

Thoughts before the film:
Well I can’t really say I like it as well cause I haven’t seen the original. Until now. #TheHillsHaveEyes

Thoughts while watching:
0:06 It’s an abandoned mine, why would you ask if anyone loves there?
0:10 What the hell was going trough that old man’s head when he decided to go that fast on a dirt road?
0:20 Don’t hurt the dog dont hurt the dog don’t hurt the dog.
0:27 That was actually really smart to use the watering can for that howling noise.
0:32 How does someone even make a noise like that!?
0:42 What was that hilariously creepy face the baby gave for?
0:45 Sheep and cows in the desert?
0:45 How did that guy sound so much like a sheep?!
0:50 How does inbred mutant know how to use a radio?
1:00 “okay pruto” (insert Dolan meme)
1:06 You’re inbred how can you tell someone pushed him!
1:09 Stop crying bitch and be useful. Almost as bad as Barbara from NOTLD.
1:23 You were hit with an axe a few times and shot, fall the fuck down.
1:27 This rattle snake sounds like my cat purring.

Overall:
I like the story of #TheHillsHaveEyes, but the movie was kinda boring. I didn’t like the abrupt ending either. It was still entertaining tho

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “The Burning” (1981)

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Tonight everyone’s favorite guest Twitter film critic Tim Schilling takes a stab at one of the most criminally underrated slashers of the 1980’s, the often ignored classic “The Burning.” Excellent special effects, a fun cast, and one hell of a villain. Does Tim like the slasher as much as we do at Slasher Studios? Let’s find out!

Thoughts before the film:
I loved this movie the first time I watched it, even more than Friday the 13th. It was actually really, really creepy.

Thoughts while watching:
0:07 His arm is completely disgusting.
0:09 I love this music.
0:11 You’re a hooker, everything’s okay with you.
0:25 Pretty sure Glazer is inbred.
0:38 All these people at this camp get over excited for basically anything.
0:46 I guess razors weren’t invented at this time.
0:54 “Come James, we seek wood!”
0:55 This guy really IS creepy.
0:57 What the heck are they using for paddles!?
0:59 Best part of the entire movie. Everyone knows of the raft scene
1:02 “That’s all?” Haha Glazer, you tool!
1:16 This abandoned building or whatever they are scene scare the poo outta me before.
1:25 Crosby looks like a pig. A scary, deformed pig
1:26 Whoa, I actually jumped when Cosby jumped on Alfred. That NEVER happens.

Overall:
Friday the 13th < #TheBurning. All day, err day. It's definitely one of my favorite slashers. #TheBurning has awesome music, actually pretty good acting, good story with no crazy inconsistencies and very creepy at parts. To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Review: “The Fog” (1980)

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Today our guest Twitter film critic Tim Schilling takes on one of John Carpenter’s most beloved movies outside of “Halloween”, the ghost chiller “The Fog.” Carpenter fans have been praising this film for years with some fans arguing that it is even better than “Halloween.” How does it stack up 30 years later? Is it an underrated classic or does it deserve to be forgotten? Let’s sift through the mist to find out…

Thoughts before the film:
Original version of #TheFog, not the remake. Though unlike 99% of the population, I did like the remake.

Thoughts while watching:
0:06 How does a rock just randomly fall out of the wall..?
0:08 One minute of sweeping a grocery store…
0:10 Geez why can’t our gas prices be that low?
0:12 When is the witching hour, anyways?
0:13 “Are you weird? Yes, yes I am!”
0:22 Jamie Lee Curtis you little whore!
0:26 The music is really similar to Halloween.
0:42 That is a crap load of stairs.
0:45 Watch out, the piece of wood is crying.
0:46 And then decides to blow up and act like nothing happened.
0:52 How can you feel so safe with him? You met him a day ago, while you were hitchhiking!
1:01 Just don’t open doors, and they won’t kill ya. That’s what happened the first time.
1:07 My theory is right, these things are like vampires! Don’t let them in and they’ll peace.
1:08 Oh wait I lied. This one really wants to get in.
1:10 Women can’t drive anyways, why would you make her try to drive stick in a hurry?!
1:13 What, can this girl see every street, house, person, everything from that lighthouse?

Overall:
I’m not sure if people will agree with me on this, but….I love the idea behind #TheFog, but the movie didn’t serve it well. Very slow pace and bad character development. On the plus side, ok music.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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