“Destination” Series Makes Right Turn with “5”

Slasher StudiosFinal Destination 5

Going into August, my expectations for “Final Destination 5” were understandably low. This is a series that really hasn’t been good in nearly a decade, the trailers were solid if uneventful, and the cast were unproven. Then something happened…the buzz for “5” actually started to get….good?!? The Saved by the Bell meets “Final Destination” video produced/preformed by co-star Max Fisher was a hoot and the early reviews were calling it the best of the series. So, I bought my ticket and went into “FD 5” as a proud horror fan. THIS would be the best installment of the series, THIS movie is going to be the best horror film of the year! Were my expectations too high? More on that later…

“FD 5” begins with a young man named Sam and a group of his co-workers from a paper plant assembly factory. They jump on a chartered bus to attend a corporate retreat. While stopped in traffic on a bridge, Sam has a vision. The suspension bridge that is under construction starts to crumble and collapse. Sam is able to convince 7 of the crew to get off the bus with him and the rest are left for dead. But..it turns out death doesn’t like to be cheated and soon the remaining eight die one by one.

Original concept? No. Great acting? No. Wonderful story? No. But..let’s be honest…who cares? “Final Destination 5” is the most fun I’ve had in the movies in months. Probably the most fun I’ve had watching a film since “Scream 4” opened in April. This movie works from beginning to end thanks to some incredible death scenes and some solid performances. This is actually the first “FD” movie that I’ve seen since part 2 in which I actually CARED about the characters. This isn’t a perfect movie. The middle drags a bit and I did feel a bit cheated by at least one death. Nonetheless, this is by far and away my favorite of the series. Just don’t let ANYONE give away the twist ending. That’s the best part of all.

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Cheating Death: “Final Destination”

Slasher StudiosFinal Destination

The long running Final Destination franchise took flight back in 2000 and has been splattering itself into theaters every few years since then. James Wong, a former X-Files producer and director, took the helm as director of this film and was able to give the movie going audience an intriguing story line to follow: Can one cheat death’s plan? The characters in this teenage supernatural-horror tried to accomplish just that.

Alex Browning and his fellow classmates were boarding a flight to Paris as he had a stunning vision of the plane blowing up. Frantic and scared, Alex made a commotion on the pane that got him as well as six others kicked off the flight. Minutes later, Alex’s premonition came true as the plane exploded just after take off. The lucky seven were able to cheat death, but for how long…? Soon after the disaster, death had came up with a new design for the surviving seven. With the FBI trying to pin Alex for foul play, one by one the friends began dying off in horrible ways as they were strangled, smashed and stabbed. Alex and the others remaining soon realize death’s new plan and did what they could to try and avoid it.

Final Destination found mixed reviews as it was released. Some complained about the acting and felt the film was dramatically flat. Many critics found it be be crude and a waste of time and money. But, with all the negativity coming from these old-stuffy and out-of-touch “film critics,” the film found itself a worthy fan base and took in 10 million on it’s opening weekend. The film peaked at number three and lasted in theaters for 22 weeks in the United States and took home an impressive 112 million internationally. With the financial success from Final Destination, this movie was able to spawn multiple sequels with the fifth installment slashing it’s way to theaters this weekend. If the film becomes a box office success, it has been reported that the 6th and 7th chapters will be then filmed back-to-back. Overall, it’s a fun start to a fun series. The characters are fairly likable here and the death scenes are fairly ingenious.

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“The Final Destination”: What a Lie…

Slasher StudiosThe Final Destination

“The Final Destination” begins with a car race in McKinley Speedway, twenty-something Nick has a premonition of a deadly car crash with many casualties in the audience and convinces his girlfriend Lori and his friends Hunt and Janet to leave the place. They are followed by the security guard; a racist guy; a mother with her children and a mechanic, that are saved from death. When the racist guy and the mother die in mysterious and creepy incidents, Nick and Lori research and find many similar cases in Internet. They try to lure The Ripper to break the chain of deadly events and survive, but destiny does not help them. Stop me if you’ve heard this before…

“The Final Destination” was supposed to be the least in the ever profitable “Final Destination” series. Well, as soon as New Line saw the cash registers ringing, another installment was quickly put into production. The film itself is one of the dumbest horror movies to ever get national release. At barely 82 minutes, its hardly even a movie. The film plays out like a collection of “best of” deaths that you might find in the $5 bin at Wal-Mart. It’s a collection of been there, done that situations in which the actors don’t have names, they have death orders. I can just see the production team now, “Body #18, you are needed on set now!” It’s all just really, really stupid. But, and this is a huge but for a lot of slasher fans, it somehow all works. It’s less serious than the disappointing “Final Destination 3” and the actors seem to be having a good time with their meager parts. I know a lot of slasher fans hate this sequel but I had a good time. Go in with low expections and maybe you’ll have a bloody blast as well.

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“Warlock Moon”: Not Quite the Howler it Appears to Be

Slasher StudiosWarlock Moon

Nothing can hurt a horror movie more than being a victim of bad timing. When “Black Christmas” was released in 1974, American audiences weren’t ready for an intelligent slasher featuring an unstoppable boogeyman that had little backstory. It wasn’t until “Halloween” was released in 1978 that audiences were willing to buy such a premise. Sadly, the same thing happened to our underappreciated slasher gem of the week, “Warlock Moon.” Released shortly before “Texas Chainsaw Massacre”, audiences didn’t know what to make of a cannibalistic family horror story. The awful title sure didn’t help matters much either.

“Warlock Moon” begins with young lovers John and Jenny (this being the 1970’s, they are young lovers who literally have JUST met) who decide to go for a drive in the countryside one day when they happen upon the remains of a long-abandoned resort spa. After doing some exploring, they find that an elderly couple is still living in the crumbling building. They tell the youngsters that the resort was shut down long ago because it was the headquarters of a satanic cult that performed cannibalistic rituals on unsuspecting visitors, and then invite the pair to stay for dinner. Will John or Jenny make it back to civilization alive? Will anyone believe their story?

“Warlock Moon” isn’t a movie that always plays fair. It tries to combine slasher elements (creepy guys with axes at the spa) and supernatural elements (an old bride who was suppose to be married at the spa but was killed and eaten on her wedding day) to a troubling twist ending that doesn’t quite provide the shock that it should. So why is “Warlock Moon” a masterpiece? This is the kind of movie that would never be made today. It is independent filmmaking at its finest. This is the sort of film in which the filmmakers and actors wear their hearts on their sleeves. It may be too ambitious but it has a sense of dread, atmosphere, and suspense that is sorely missing from horror today. The cherry on top of the sundae? A hilarious commentary featuring the wonderful Joe Bob Briggs who goes to great detail to tell why witches are misunderstood today as well as why “Warlock Moon” is the worst title for a horror movie ever. It’s a hilarious listen but the movie is well worth checking out as well.

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Slasher Death of the Day: “Chopping Mall”

Slasher Studios*Horror
Where Shopping Costs You an Arm AND a Leg!

We here at Slasher Studios have a love for Chopping Mall that runs deep. You can check out our review here to know all of the juicy bits that we love about this movie and why we believe it is an underrated masterpiece of a slasher flick. Nonetheless, that being said, we are pleased to bring you our slasher death of the day. It’s a hilarious mock-up of the laser to the head ultimate death of the film. Slasher fans enjoy and hopefully this will cure your Monday afternoon blues.

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Scream Queen of the Week: Lisa Wilcox

Slasher Studios*Scream Queen of the Week

What makes a good Scream Queen or Final Girl? Well, near the top of the list of qualifications, the girl in question needs to actually survive the film that she is in. Well, this brings us to our Slasher Studios Scream Queen of the Week, the lovely Lisa Wilcox. You see Lisa is the only person in the entire “Nightmare on Elm Street” series to successfully live through two films. That puts her a cut about Heather Langenkamp who sadly dies in “Nightmare 3”. Yes, I know Heather returns for “New Nightmare” but she is playing herself so different rules apply. So what makes Lisa a great Scream Queen? She is beautiful, resourceful, and immensely likable.

Alice is one of the few characters from the Nightmare series that we actually see grow throughout the films. In “Nightmare 4” is the shy, timid, plain girl next door who lets the world walk all over her. By the end of the film, she has grown into a fighter. She isn’t willing to just let Freddy take over her life..she has become stronger than that. Even in “Nightmare 5”, which is one of the weaker sequels in the franchise, she is determined to beat Freddy in order to save her unborn baby. Today Lisa has shied away from horror and that’s really too bad. She’s a very beautiful and intelligent actor who should have taken the horror world by storm. Still, given her strong performance as Alice, she still deserves the wonderful title of Scream Queen of the Week.

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Slasher Studios: Greatest Fears

Slasher Studios*Slasher Studios Podcast

On this week’s episode of Slasher Studios, Kevin Sommerfield and Steve Goltz will be talking about their great fears. Stuff that scares them, freaks them out, or things that they could never imagine happening to them. They will also be talking about horror filmmakers can use these fears to make a successful scary movie. It’s going to be a great show so make sure to tune and talk about your greatest fears. Click on the link below to listen live tonight at 10PM central or to check out one of our previous shows:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/slasherstudios/2011/08/08/slasher-studios-greatest-fears

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Spreading Holiday Fear: “Black Christmas” (1974) Review

Slasher StudiosBlack Christmas (1974)

Forget about the 2006 version, THIS movie is where the terror really started. It’s time for Christmas break, and the sorority sisters make plans for the holiday, but the strange anonymous phone calls are beginning to put them on edge. When Clare disappears, they contact the police, who don’t express much concern. Meanwhile Jess is planning to get an abortion, but boyfriend Peter is very much against it. The police finally begin to get concerned when a 13-year-old girl is found dead in the park. They set up a wiretap to the sorority house, but will they be there in time to save a young sorority girl from being murdered?

“Black Christmas” is that rare horror movie that gets everything right. This is a movie that just oozes atmosphere. Every frame is dripping with dread and setting the film on the Christmas just adds to the excitement of it all. Not only this but the film is also scary as hell with some excellent performances and an ending that is sure to give every horror fan chills. What is the most incredible aspect of this groundbreaking slasher film? Throughout the entire film, we see various sorority girls getting hacked to death and receiving strange telephone calls. What we don’t see is our psycho, Billy. No motive, no reason, no face, no man..Billy could be anyone of us. If that doesn’t make a true psycho, I really don’t know what does.

“Black Christmas” is quite simply the best horror movie I’ve ever seen. Some give the credit to “Halloween” to being the first real American slasher film but that simply is not fair. “Black Christmas” did it first and did it better. It is the grandmother of the slasher film, four years before “Halloween”. “Black Christmas’” power is impossible to deny; its characters are compelling, the imagery poignant, and the acting top-notch. If you haven’t seen it yet, you are in for one scary “Christmas” treat.

To order: Black Christmas (Special Edition)

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Scream Queen of the Week: Adrienne Barbeau

Slasher Studios*Scream Queen of the Week

The ever enchanting Adrienne Barbeau is best known among horror fans as one of the original Scream Queens. She is one of the few actresses who is not afraid to attack each role with gusto. From Stevie Wayne, the beautiful, gravelly voiced DJ in John Carpenter’s “The Fog” to the biggest bitch of in all horror anthologies, Wilma Northrup, in George Romero’s “Creepshow”; there is simply nothing that Barbeau can’t do. She has worked with some of the greats of the genre, including the aforementioned Carpenter and Romero, she has also appeared as Alice Cable in Wes Craven’s underrated classic “Swamp Thing”. More recently she appearing in one of the best direct to video horror films Slasher Studios has ever seen, “The Convent”. A mix of “Evil Dead” and “Night of the Demons”, “The Convent” is a hoot and a must see for every genre fan. If you haven’t seen it yet, click on the link below and order your copy today. we PROMISE you that you won’t regret it and Slasher Studios never breaks a promise.

To order: The Convent

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Slasher Hero of the Week: Joe Bob Briggs

Slasher Studios*Horror
The King of Drive-In Cinema

Let’s be honest, in the horror world is there anyone out there that is cooler than Joe Bob Briggs? He’s smart, he’s funny, he’s an avid horror fan, and he just wants to make you laugh. If only there were more people in the horror world like him. He’s pretty much some sort of amazing.

Joe Bob Briggs’s acting persona is that of an unapologetic and unrefined redneck and male chauvinist with an avowed love of the drive-in theatre. He specializes in humorous but appreciative reviews of b-movies and cult films, which he calls drive-in movies (as distinguished from “indoor bullstuff”). In addition to his usual parody of urbane, high-brow movie criticism, his columns characteristically include colorful tales of woman-troubles and high-spirited brushes with the law, tales which inevitably conclude with his rush to catch a movie at a local drive-in, usually with female companionship. The reviews typically end with a brief rating of the “high points” of the movie in question, including the types of action (represented by nouns naming objects used in fight scenes suffixed with -fu), the number of bodies, number of female breasts bared, the notional number of pints of blood spilled, and for appropriately untoward movies a “vomit meter”. A typical such concluding paragraph would be, “No dead bodies. One hundred seventeen breasts. Multiple aardvarking. Lap dancing. Cage dancing. Convenience-store dancing. Blindfold aardvarking. Blind-MAN aardvarking. Lesbo Fu. Pool cue-fu. Drive-In Academy Award nominations for Tane McClure. Joe Bob says check it out.” “Aardvarking” is Brigg’s euphemism for sexual intercourse.

From 1995 to 2000, he hosted “Monstervision” for TNT. The show often featured Briggs giving a monologue about certain things in life, including his four ex-wives (usually “Wanda Bodeine”). He often made fun of the “scissoring” (editing) of the films, saying “Has Ted (Turner) been crackin’ down on us again?” This led to a famous running gag during a Halloween marathon of Friday the 13th movies in which strange occurrences kept happening throughout the night, leading up to Joe Bob realizing that it was Ted Turner trying to kill him, the final scene of the event led to Joe Bob giving an impassioned apology to Turner, claiming he was an amazing person, before the video feed cut off eerily. A similar stunt was staged in Blair Witch-themed host segments for a marathon showing of Carrie, Child’s Play and Phantasm one night, with the host mysteriously missing. For Super Bowl Sunday in 1997, he hosted a 16-hour marathon of monster movies from New Orleans starting with The Omen.

This week at Slasher Studios, we salute you Joe Bob Briggs and we hope that you come back to “tear the heart out of Saturday night”.

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