Horror Movie Challenge: Day 13: Favorite Foreign Horror (Martyrs)

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“Martyrs” is the kind of movie that makes you want to take a shower immediately after viewing it. It is bleak, hopeless, and has a constant theme of despair. It is also brilliant in the way that it is able to depict the suffering that one human being can force onto another. It is gore but it is poetic gore with a clear message for it’s audience. I don’t know that I can or will ever watch this masterpiece again and it is too bad that the ending gets a bit too abstract for its own good but it is still a worthwhile watch. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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31 Days of Horror: Day 13: “Warlock” (1989)

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If you are into cult horror films then you probably already know of Warlock, if not, the this may be a new one for you. Directed by Steve Miner, know for his Friday the 13th fame, Warlock begins in the 1600’s and with the help of a fancy CGI portal, we are taken to the glorious 1980’s. Along for the ride is a witch hunter and the Warlock himself. The Warlock is taken in by the very 80’s Kassandra and it’s not too long before he goes on a bit of a killing spree with the witch hunter on his tail.

The production value is surprisingly high with solid cinematography, costuming, acting and location selection. The effects were also very impressive and fun too watch as Steve Miner really brought this unique film to life. It was able to drag in $9 million plus at the box office and has gained a cult following as of late.

Although this is a well produced project, don’t go in expecting a similar feel and tone to Miner’s Friday films. Warlock is much more serious and plays with a mysterious and slower pace. If you are looking for something out of the ordinary, and are a fan of Mr. Miner, grab some popcorn and pop this in tonight.

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31 Days of Horror: Day 12: “Blood Junkie” (2010)

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Set in 1989′s Wisconsin and described as a “hyper-hipster 1980s horror comedy”, Blood Junkie tells the story of two teenage girls Laura (Sarah Luther) and Rachel (Emily Treolo) who are babysitting Laura’s little brother for the weekend. Left with $35 (“Do you know how much alcohol you can buy for $35? A LOT!”), the two girls head to the local gas station to get some supplies. It is at the gas station that they meet Teddy (Mike Johnson) and Craig (Nick Sommer), a couple of guys looking to go camping and score for the weekend. Before long the fivesome have made their way to the forest for some sex, drugs, and death.

Can I describe for you in a sentence how this movie looks? The sets look like someone threw up wood chips and the clothes look like they were hand me downs of hand me downs of hand me downs from decades past. This might not be a selling point for many, but for me, this film never loses sight of its 80′s homage style. The performances are all absolutely perfect with special attention paid to the Nick Sommer as hot-shot Craig with one of the ugliest mullets and sweaters around. If anyone could sell this asshole character and make him likeable, it is Sommer. An all around fun time, if you like your slasher films cheap with a good sense of humor about themselves, this is a must watch.

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Horror Movie Challenge: Day 12: Gory Horror (Cabin Fever 2)

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Day 12: Goriest Horror I’ve Seen….Cabin Fever 2

“Cabin Fever 2” is a messy, gory, bloody cherry on top of a demented sundae. From the opening (poor Rider Strong) to the blood bath of an ending, nearly everything about this sequel works. This is one of those slasher movies where I just don’t understand the hate. Had this movie been made in the 1980′s and directed by Sam Raimi, horror fans would be praising this as the next second coming of horror. The gore is demented, the kills are extremely disgusting, and the central love story is actually quite sweet. I was actually touched at the sacrifice that one friend gave so another could live. So the epilogue doesn’t really work (poor Ti West got his movie taken away from him and had his ending completely butchered just to go in some producer cameos) but this is splatstick at its very best. If John Waters directed a horror film in the 1980’s, it would look something like this. Bloody recommended!

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31 Days of Horror: Day 11: “Curtains” (1983)

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“Curtains” is a whopper of a slasher film that does nearly everything right. Creepy costume? Check. Intriguing backstory? Check. Likable, if slightly over-the-top, characters? Check. Great death scenes? Double check. I know this movie went though hell in post production. Rumor has it that the film was shelved for a year, during which there were re-writes, re-shoots, and one major re-casting done. Eventually numerous crew members had to be re-hired to shoot the footage to complete the film.

This movie should be a mess. The fact that it isn’t is a miracle in and of itself but the fact that the movie is a damn near masterpiece? Well, let’s just say that the slasher gods must have been looking down on this movie because it is simply incredible. Love the twist at the end, love the figure skater who gets killed by the masked man in the old hag mask, and love the final chase. Sure it isn’t entirely believable and there is a bit of logic that must be stretched thin but that doesn’t stop this movie from being one of the best of its kind. Definitely worth checking out for slasher fans everywhere.

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Horror Movie Challenge: Day 11: Most Psychotic Killer: Beverly Sutphin (Serial Mom)

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As Serial Mom begins we meet Beverly Sutphin (in a go-for-broke pitch perfect performance by Kathleen Turner). She appears to be a typical suburban housewife living with her dentist husband Eugene (Sam Waterston) and their children, Misty (Ricki Lake) and Chip (Matthew Lillard) in the suburbs of Baltimore. Behind her Doris Day façade, however, she is a serial killer, murdering people over the smallest criticism, insult or slight. We open on the Sutphin family having breakfast and Beverly carefully taking care of family’s every needs until two police officers arrive to question the family about the mail threats and obscene phone calls to a fellow resident of the area, Dottie Hinkle (the wonderful Mink Stole). “Now who on earth would ever want to harass poor Dottie Hinkle,” Beverly states. Well of course it is Beverly. As we see a brief flashback, Beverly is still upset over Dottie stealing her parking spot at Jo Ann Fabrics. No, seriously.

The first murder she is known (the movie plays out like a true crime reenactment complete with time stamps) to commit occurs after Beverly attends a PTA where Mr. Stubbins, Chip’s high school math teacher, criticizes her son’s morbid fascination with violent horror films and recommends therapy for Chip. She runs him over with her car, killing him. How DARE he disrespect the horror genre! Bastard had it coming.

The following morning, Misty is upset when she gets stood up by a date, Carl Pageant, proclaiming her desire to kill him. Beverly cautions Misty about using words she doesn’t mean and subsequently sees the police investigating her trash cans and her car. Beverly skillfully deflects the cops’ questions before her husband asks the cops to leave. Later, seeing Carl with another girl at a local indoor swap meet, Beverly impales him in a men’s restroom with a fireplace poker that Rosemary, who came along, had purchased.

A death by blow torch for not wearing a seatbeat and a killing by rack of lamb to the tune “Tomorrow” from the movie Annie for not rewinding Ghost Dad are two more deaths for Beverly before she is arrested. Now it is on to the trial and this is where the movie really kicks into high gear. Selling everything from Serial Mom t-shirts to Serial Mom books…everyone is off to make a profit off Beverly. Even Suzanne Somers (in a wonderful tongue-in-cheek performance as herself) who plans to play Beverly in the soon to be made mini-series.

Serial Mom is that perfect pitch black satire Hollywood never makes. The film was a bomb on its initial release grossing only $6 million on a $14 million profit and that’s a shame. From the game cast to spot on direction from Waters, everything works. This is the type of movie that you will either find hysterical or you will wonder where all the laughs are. This movie makes me smile like a naughty little kid and I try to watch it every Mother’s Day with my mom. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.

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31 Days of Horror: Day 10: “Tourist Trap” (1979)

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Creepy, Creepy, Creepy. That’s the best way to describe the 1979 horror flick, Tourist Trap. Directed and co-written by David Schmoeller, Tourist Trap follows the adventure of a few young friends who find themselves stranded and at the mercy of an old, shotgun toting and yes, creepy, man. As the group unwisely trusts the old man, Slausen, they go back to his place and find an odd collection of some very life-like mannequins.

The film has a great look and a solid story. Great locations and solid camera work help boost the production value of this 24 day shoot. A 90 minute runtime allows Schmoeller to do a fantastic job capturing the uneasy feel and relaying that to the audience. There are a number of scenes that will make your skin crawl and make you think twice about watching this one alone in the dark next time.

The acting is without any serious problems and it is fun to see a young Tanya Roberts(That 70’s Show) take on a role of this nature. The villain is just about as creepy as they get with help from an amazing mask. This is another mask that needs a be produced for the fans to buy. What a fantastic addition to any horror collection that mask would be.

So if Tourist Trap is one film that you have not seen yet, do yourself a huge favor and see it as soon as you can. This is a truly great late 70’s horror film and one of Slasher Studios personal favorites!

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Horror Movie Challenge: Day 10: Favorite “Classic” Horror (Friday the 13th)

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My favorite classic horror film is easily the original Friday the 13th. I fell in love with this film the first time I saw it and I have watched it countless times since then. It had a huge impact on my desire to become a filmmaker and trying different filmmaking techniques. This piece of art has been not only influential on myself, but many, many other horror fans as well. I love the story, the characters, the deaths and just that classic overall 80’s feel.

The setting in Friday is picture perfect. The dense forest, contrasted with the wide open lake, creates cinematic beauty as this backdrop for the film has turned into an instant classic and makes Camp Crystal Lake is instantly recognizable. This setting has been a staple in the horror genre and with such a huge 80’s horror fan base in the world, this will only continue.

I have always been a huge fan of the characters. I really did enjoy them all. The main cast, including Kevin Bacon and Adrian King, had the acting abilities and screen presence to help make this film what it has become. But, in my mind, the real treats are the supporting characters. Sandy from the diner and Crazy Ralph are some of my all-time favorite movie characters and I still find myself quoting their quirky and classic lines.

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31 Days of Horror: Day 9: “Jack-O” (1995)

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Directed by Steve Latshaw, Jack-O is the third installment in his horror trilogy. Starring the horror queen, Linnea Quigley, and being sent stright to video in 1995, Jack-O was not fortunate enough to get a wide theatrical release. But with a DVD release in 2005, this film has began to pick up a fan base.

Jack-O is a revenge tale that features a pumpkin-headed, scythe-wielding demon who has risen from his grave to enact revenge. This film has blood, bad acting and boobs. What could go wrong!? Well a few things. It’s interesting because this movie could really fall into the, “it’s so bad, it’s good” category, but I’m not sure if it fits there either. The film isn’t terrible, and in fact I really did have a good time with it, but the flashback and dream sequences were just not for me. I can definitely see that need for something to help tie the past in with the present time, but for me they just became old and boring at times. The present day scenes were much more fun and entertaining. Love the rock throwing scene at the beginning, it’s just so bad…

The villain, however, was great. The look of Jack-O was spot on to what they needed and if things were a bit different and this was perhaps made in a different decade, Jack-O could have been the next great horror franchise. But who knows what the future will hold for Jack-O. Will fans pick this film up and fall in love, or will it just be left in the rear view mirror as we find other lost slasher gems…? Only time will tell.

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Not Quite Horror: “A Serious Man” (2009)

Not Quite Horror contains reviews of films not traditionally considered horror films. By analyzing them as horror films (identifying the monster, discussing the shared worry for the audience and the main characters, and understanding the depth of horror available to the viewer), who knows? There’s more than one way to watch a movie.

A Serious Man (2009)

The Monster: Larry Gopnik is the monster in this film, but he is a very human and noble monster. There’s nothing wrong with Larry Gopnik, except no one will take him seriously. His wife is leaving him for another man, and her lover wants all three of them to talk about it. He has a smart but unstable brother. He feels threatened by his neighbors.

As the pressure builds, Larry Gopnik must face the real possibility he will never be taken seriously by anyone.

The Horror: Miserable as his life is, Gopnik seems destined to escape his own bad luck when the universe itself seems to drop in on him. He feels the weight of this horror in his office, but his son sees it in the form of a tornado approaching his school. As is Coen Brothers tradition, the search for dignity and meaning are met with shocking confusion.

The Shared Fate: Like Larry Gopnik, we are constantly at the mercy of others. We can try to find a higher authority to appeal to, but none of these authorities can save the average people in Coen Brothers movies. We are doomed to be treated as others see fit to treat us.

Even when his world makes him into a monster, Gopnik tries. He appeals to three rabbis, and he finds no help. The wisest of these rabbis refuses to see him, but shares a very honest – and not serious – moment with Gopnik’s son later in the film. Perhaps we should all be more like the son than the father.

— I am indebted to Noel Carroll’s The Philosophy of Horror for his ideas on defining horror, as well as John Skipp and Craig Spector’s article “Death’s Rich Pageantry, or Skipp & Spector’s Handy-Dandy Splatterpunk Guide to the Horrors of Non-horror Film” in Cut! Horror Writers on Horror Film for a similar idea.–

–Axel Kohagen

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